Well hey there you fabulous people.
I decided to post this, since I the story I wrote entitled "The Disappearance of Sarah" is frightening to read, since it's so poorly written. I'll work on that.
This is an essay/story I wrote in sixth grade about some animals I saw at the zoo for my English class. It's tolerable since I wrote it near the end of the year, but still pretty weird.
Also Weebly messed up the formatting, so I had to redo it. Apologies if some things still look wonky.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Hey. My name is Will, short for William Shakesphere. I’m actually a frog.
I live in a wetland tank at some zoo. I live here with my best friend Bob
Smith and his girlfriend Shelby Sharkeisha. They’re turtles.
There are a couple of other guys living here. Patrick (one of the fish)
had his wedding ceremony last week. At least, I think it was last week. It’s not
like there’s a clock in here or anything.
Let me confess something. It truly, really, absolutely gets boring in
here. I mean, at first it’s cool. The keeper of our tank (I think his name is
Richard?) brings you food. You meet new people. Then you realize that no matter
what you do, you can’t get away from Shelby’s disgusting spinach puffs. She
cooks them with mustard! MUSTARD, I TELL YOU! Who cooks spinach puffs with
mustard?
See, that’s the problem with the tank. You can’t get out.
That’s why I accepted Bob’s request to escape the tank with him. It was a
Tuesday (Tuesday? Yes, Tuesday) night in the tank. I was contemplating my life
when he approached me.
“Hey…Will…you want to escape with me?” Bob announced to me out of the
blue.
“Sure. Whatever.” Okay, yeah. I was a moron. I wasn’t really thinking.
How could we get out of the tank in the first place?
It was just another one of his crazy schemes.
I started to believe him when I woke up in a warm, dark room a month
later. I assumed it was the middle of the
night.
“Will…WILL!” It was Bob. Screaming in my face.
“Bob…” I sighed. He’s delusional. “Okay. First of all, personal space.
Second of all…” I paused to look around. This was NOT the tank. “…where are
we?”
“I escaped for you!” Bob quickly replied. “Don’t ask how. You were asleep. Saying something about...meatballs..."
Confession #1: I talk in my sleep.
Anyway, back to reality. There had been several escape attempts before.
How, out of all the amazing smart and nimble minds, did Bob escape? Did he
conspire with Richard? Could he have bribed someone?
Then I realized the texture of the floor. This wasn’t the familiar dirt,
logs, and sticks of the aquarium. It was cold stone.
I looked up. There was the tank. Still partly illuminated. Not a
sound.
We were officially out.
A rush of adrenaline overtook me, and all I remember for the next two
hours was me running for my life. The scenery was a distant blur. I just ran and
ran and ran.
We stopped under an oak tree flanking the sidewalk. We caught our
breath.
The adrenaline wore off. Then I started thinking again. What were the
guys doing back at the tank? Isn’t this the time that the
keeper…
I froze. “BOB! YOU IDIOT! THE KEEPERS! They’ll surely catch us! If not
them, the cameras will!”
More adrenaline. I hopped for my life.
“WILL! Wait! You shouldn’t –“
I forgot about Bob. I just hopped to the nearest place I felt safe.
I fell into a pond.
And believe me, that water was COLD! You crazy humans are used to your
bubbly sudsy sauna bubble baths. This was different.
Being cold-blooded, I am 99.9% sure that I almost died. My thoughts
blurred for a moment, then I submerged. I lifted myself up onto a slightly
warmer rock and stayed there.
To be real with you, I don’t know when I noticed the seal.
It was a silver seal. Long whiskers and big fat black eyes that stared
into your soul. I was done.
Then it talked.
“Hello?” It regarded me cautiously. Was it a girl or a boy? See that’s
the thing with other species. You can never really tell. It took me about a
month to tell what Bob was without getting all
awkward.
Confession #2: Never look for body parts. You will get
slapped.
“Uh…hi?” My life had taken a turn for the worst. This was pure
torture.
“My name is Wisteria. I’m a girl.” It —excuse me – she told me.
Wait. Why was she telling me this?
“I can read minds.” She answered my thoughts.
Okay. Wait. SHE ANSWERED MY THOUGHTS?! WHAT KIND OF SICK AND TWISTED
WORLD IS THIS?!
“You’re scared. Do you need a place to—“ Wisteria was cut off by the
sound of impending doom.
Confession #3: “Impending doom” in zoo animal code is the sound of a
rather round keeper rolling around
outside.
“YesyesyesyesYESYESYES!!” I whisper-screamed. “NO.
TIME!”
I hopped on her stomach and she took me to a rocky section of her little
cove setup. She hid me inside and flopped in the water. Obviously pretending to
sleep. Or die. Either one, I'm not a seal expert.
“What the heck is this?” I heard the distant keeper. It was Kevin, the
seal exhibit keeper. Famous for prowling around the zoo after hours and eating
nachos. I tried to listen. Where was he?
“A turtle? What the frickfrack-paddilywack are you doing out of your
exhibit?” Kevin pondered. A breathed a sigh of relief. I wasn’t going to
die.
Then my heart stopped. That ugly obese monster had Bob!
I heard the sound of his boots crunching away. I dared to look over the
edge of the rock. I could see that Wisteria was looking
too.
Then a sonic boom was heard. A really loud one. A bright neon orange
blast exploded over the edge of the seal exhibit. I saw Kevin being blasted over
the wall. He splashed in the cold water. He was
unconscious.
Confession #4: Just because frogs don’t have visible ears, doesn’t mean
we can’t hear.
In a matter of seconds, Wisteria and I were investigating the wall. We
couldn’t see anything. Nothing happened.
Just then, a tiny green head peeked over the metal railing. It was Bob!
“Guys! Come up!” He yelled as he threw a rope down.
Inexplicably, we were able to climb it.
Confession #5: Animals are mysterious beings. Not even we understand
ourselves.
As I met Bob at the top, I surveyed the scene. A rather large orange and
black ray gun lay abandoned on the sidewalk. There was a black burn mark on the
sidewalk. “What even happened here?” I asked him.
“So…I owe you an explanation,” Bob started off.
I rolled my eyes. “Oh, here we go.”
“May I?” Wisteria announced. I forgot she was there. “You’re a secret
spy. Your fictional zoo animal powers allowed you to summon a ray gun. Kevin’s
memory of this happening is erased and we can feast on his nachos.”
“Yeah. Pretty much.” Bob agreed. We turned to look at the path. Our
adventure was just beginning…
“Why did you even want to escape?” I questioned Bob.
“Two words: spinach puffs.” He replied with a laugh.
SLAP! A stray hand came out
of nowhere and slapped Bob in the face. He fell over, writhing around in
pain.
“WHAT did you say about my spinach puffs?!” Shelby Sharkeisha
screamed.
Confession #6: I’m going to die today.
I decided to post this, since I the story I wrote entitled "The Disappearance of Sarah" is frightening to read, since it's so poorly written. I'll work on that.
This is an essay/story I wrote in sixth grade about some animals I saw at the zoo for my English class. It's tolerable since I wrote it near the end of the year, but still pretty weird.
Also Weebly messed up the formatting, so I had to redo it. Apologies if some things still look wonky.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Hey. My name is Will, short for William Shakesphere. I’m actually a frog.
I live in a wetland tank at some zoo. I live here with my best friend Bob
Smith and his girlfriend Shelby Sharkeisha. They’re turtles.
There are a couple of other guys living here. Patrick (one of the fish)
had his wedding ceremony last week. At least, I think it was last week. It’s not
like there’s a clock in here or anything.
Let me confess something. It truly, really, absolutely gets boring in
here. I mean, at first it’s cool. The keeper of our tank (I think his name is
Richard?) brings you food. You meet new people. Then you realize that no matter
what you do, you can’t get away from Shelby’s disgusting spinach puffs. She
cooks them with mustard! MUSTARD, I TELL YOU! Who cooks spinach puffs with
mustard?
See, that’s the problem with the tank. You can’t get out.
That’s why I accepted Bob’s request to escape the tank with him. It was a
Tuesday (Tuesday? Yes, Tuesday) night in the tank. I was contemplating my life
when he approached me.
“Hey…Will…you want to escape with me?” Bob announced to me out of the
blue.
“Sure. Whatever.” Okay, yeah. I was a moron. I wasn’t really thinking.
How could we get out of the tank in the first place?
It was just another one of his crazy schemes.
I started to believe him when I woke up in a warm, dark room a month
later. I assumed it was the middle of the
night.
“Will…WILL!” It was Bob. Screaming in my face.
“Bob…” I sighed. He’s delusional. “Okay. First of all, personal space.
Second of all…” I paused to look around. This was NOT the tank. “…where are
we?”
“I escaped for you!” Bob quickly replied. “Don’t ask how. You were asleep. Saying something about...meatballs..."
Confession #1: I talk in my sleep.
Anyway, back to reality. There had been several escape attempts before.
How, out of all the amazing smart and nimble minds, did Bob escape? Did he
conspire with Richard? Could he have bribed someone?
Then I realized the texture of the floor. This wasn’t the familiar dirt,
logs, and sticks of the aquarium. It was cold stone.
I looked up. There was the tank. Still partly illuminated. Not a
sound.
We were officially out.
A rush of adrenaline overtook me, and all I remember for the next two
hours was me running for my life. The scenery was a distant blur. I just ran and
ran and ran.
We stopped under an oak tree flanking the sidewalk. We caught our
breath.
The adrenaline wore off. Then I started thinking again. What were the
guys doing back at the tank? Isn’t this the time that the
keeper…
I froze. “BOB! YOU IDIOT! THE KEEPERS! They’ll surely catch us! If not
them, the cameras will!”
More adrenaline. I hopped for my life.
“WILL! Wait! You shouldn’t –“
I forgot about Bob. I just hopped to the nearest place I felt safe.
I fell into a pond.
And believe me, that water was COLD! You crazy humans are used to your
bubbly sudsy sauna bubble baths. This was different.
Being cold-blooded, I am 99.9% sure that I almost died. My thoughts
blurred for a moment, then I submerged. I lifted myself up onto a slightly
warmer rock and stayed there.
To be real with you, I don’t know when I noticed the seal.
It was a silver seal. Long whiskers and big fat black eyes that stared
into your soul. I was done.
Then it talked.
“Hello?” It regarded me cautiously. Was it a girl or a boy? See that’s
the thing with other species. You can never really tell. It took me about a
month to tell what Bob was without getting all
awkward.
Confession #2: Never look for body parts. You will get
slapped.
“Uh…hi?” My life had taken a turn for the worst. This was pure
torture.
“My name is Wisteria. I’m a girl.” It —excuse me – she told me.
Wait. Why was she telling me this?
“I can read minds.” She answered my thoughts.
Okay. Wait. SHE ANSWERED MY THOUGHTS?! WHAT KIND OF SICK AND TWISTED
WORLD IS THIS?!
“You’re scared. Do you need a place to—“ Wisteria was cut off by the
sound of impending doom.
Confession #3: “Impending doom” in zoo animal code is the sound of a
rather round keeper rolling around
outside.
“YesyesyesyesYESYESYES!!” I whisper-screamed. “NO.
TIME!”
I hopped on her stomach and she took me to a rocky section of her little
cove setup. She hid me inside and flopped in the water. Obviously pretending to
sleep. Or die. Either one, I'm not a seal expert.
“What the heck is this?” I heard the distant keeper. It was Kevin, the
seal exhibit keeper. Famous for prowling around the zoo after hours and eating
nachos. I tried to listen. Where was he?
“A turtle? What the frickfrack-paddilywack are you doing out of your
exhibit?” Kevin pondered. A breathed a sigh of relief. I wasn’t going to
die.
Then my heart stopped. That ugly obese monster had Bob!
I heard the sound of his boots crunching away. I dared to look over the
edge of the rock. I could see that Wisteria was looking
too.
Then a sonic boom was heard. A really loud one. A bright neon orange
blast exploded over the edge of the seal exhibit. I saw Kevin being blasted over
the wall. He splashed in the cold water. He was
unconscious.
Confession #4: Just because frogs don’t have visible ears, doesn’t mean
we can’t hear.
In a matter of seconds, Wisteria and I were investigating the wall. We
couldn’t see anything. Nothing happened.
Just then, a tiny green head peeked over the metal railing. It was Bob!
“Guys! Come up!” He yelled as he threw a rope down.
Inexplicably, we were able to climb it.
Confession #5: Animals are mysterious beings. Not even we understand
ourselves.
As I met Bob at the top, I surveyed the scene. A rather large orange and
black ray gun lay abandoned on the sidewalk. There was a black burn mark on the
sidewalk. “What even happened here?” I asked him.
“So…I owe you an explanation,” Bob started off.
I rolled my eyes. “Oh, here we go.”
“May I?” Wisteria announced. I forgot she was there. “You’re a secret
spy. Your fictional zoo animal powers allowed you to summon a ray gun. Kevin’s
memory of this happening is erased and we can feast on his nachos.”
“Yeah. Pretty much.” Bob agreed. We turned to look at the path. Our
adventure was just beginning…
“Why did you even want to escape?” I questioned Bob.
“Two words: spinach puffs.” He replied with a laugh.
SLAP! A stray hand came out
of nowhere and slapped Bob in the face. He fell over, writhing around in
pain.
“WHAT did you say about my spinach puffs?!” Shelby Sharkeisha
screamed.
Confession #6: I’m going to die today.